PUZZLES & CAMO SHELLY HUHTANEN

Bane of My Existence

It's very difficult for Broden to understand that when things aren't working, he needs to be patient and he needs to do without. In his world, that cannot be an option.

I'm a creature of habit. After I drop Broden off at his ABA clinic and if my schedule allows it, I'll head over to a local gym in town to blow off some steam. Like any gym, I've started to pick out the regulars and over time, I've exchanged smiles, head nods, or a casual "hello". A few weeks ago, while I was walking the track, an older fella named Earnest called out to me. "Hello! I'm Earnest. What's your name? I have to make it to 10,000 steps. Can you walk and talk with me until I reach my goal?" I agreed to the challenge. We talked about what I do for a living and how he was a Navy vet. As weeks passed, if I happened to be walking the track, Earnest would catch up with me and ask how I was doing, and check on Mark and the boys. A few days ago, he asked me "What's autism anyway? I really don't understand what it is. Can you explain it to me?"

As I took a deep sigh, I turned my head away from him and looked down the track, “Well Earnest, the easy, straightforward definition is that it’s a developmental disability that affects how one communicates.  They may show repetitive and rigid behaviors, and social situations can be difficult.” He nodded to me as he was processing my definition and then said, “Ok, I think I understand.” I then said, “Ya know, autism is so much more. I would need more time to build a better definition for you. I can’t describe how many facets of life autism seeps into. Not just Broden’s life, but our family’s life as well.” I gave him an example of our trip to Huntsville, so he could understand. 

Last week, Mark, Broden and I drove to Huntsville, Alabama to pick Hayden up from college and move him back home

for the summer. Mark and I know how to pack when travelling with Broden. If we have his iPhone and his iPad working, with back up battery phone chargers and a detailed itinerary to follow, Broden can be a great traveler. If one of those things is missing, we are in for a bumpy ride. iPhones and YouTube can be a gift and a curse. I scoff every time I relive the moment when I was told that I should get Broden an iPad because of all the great apps for autism that were being created. Now, electronics are the bane of my existence. Electronics are like

POWER PROBLEM: "Electronics are like an umbilical cord to Broden, and I have no idea how to find anything that competes with the joy and comfort they give him."

an umbilical cord to Broden, and I have no idea how to find anything that competes with the joy and comfort they give him. I guess this is something he has in common with the rest of us, but there is a difference. The difference is the dependence on electronics for someone

with autism, because it is very difficult for Broden to understand that when things aren't working, he needs to be patient. Sometimes, there are things out of our control and we have to do without. In Broden's world, that cannot be an option.

The first few hours of our trip to Huntsville were smooth. I looked over at Mark, “We should be in Huntsville by 6 pm or so. I’m texting Hayden that we can head to dinner when we get there.” Mark agreed. As we started our way into Atlanta, traffic started to pick up. As our lanes started to multiply, and we wondered where all the cars and trucks came from, Broden shoved his purple iPhone into my shoulder and said, “I need help.” The screen was black, so I grabbed one of the chargers and plugged it in, “Broden, it needs to charge. You have to be patient.” Broden started to get more upset and the screen stayed black. I tried to restart it. Nothing happened. Then I started to panic, “Mark, we need to pull over. I can’t figure out what’s going on with Broden’s purple iPhone. I will not drive though Atlanta with Broden screaming. Find an exit.” As Broden started to scream more, his juice spilled and soaked the floorboard of our car. I clenched my face in frustration, as Mark sped into the first gas station he saw, “Go in there and see if there are some paper towels. I don’t know if we have enough in the car to clean this mess up. I’ll see what’s going on with his purple iPhone.” I ran into the gas station and found generic