FIELD DAY: Charlie, Jude and Billie among the flowers; "Brothers and sisters of children with autism frequently face their own challenges. Much more may be expected from these siblings."
a pedicure or manicure. I make time for myself whenever I need to get out of the house, even for a few hours."
For parents and caregivers who are overwhelmed or struggling to find balance in their lives, these five self-care tips can help:
- Get going. Get your children started in therapies and activities. If you know your children are engaged in meaningful activities, you can better focus on moving forward. It may also free up time to educate yourself, advocate for your children and take care of yourself. Getting started with therapies and interventions can help to build a team of people who care for your children and want to see them succeed.
- Ask for help. Asking for help can be very hard, especially at first. Don't hesitate to use whatever support is available to you. People around you may want to help, but may not know how. Is there someone who can take your kids somewhere for an afternoon or cook dinner for your family one night? Maybe someone can pick a few things up for you at the store or do a load of laundry.
- Talk to someone. Everyone needs someone to talk to. Let someone know what you are going through and how you feel. Someone who just listens can be a great source of strength. If you can't get out of the house, use the phone to call a friend.
It may be helpful to listen or talk to people who have been or are going
through a similar experience. Support groups can be great sources of information about services and providers available in your area. You may also want to consider getting your children involved in local recreational programs for children with autism. This may be a good way to meet other parents like you.
- 4. Take a break. If you can, allow yourself to take some time away, even if it is only a few minutes to take a walk. If it's possible, getting out to a movie, going shopping or visiting a friend can make a world of difference. If you feel guilty about taking a break, try to remind yourself that this break will help you feel renewed for the things you need to do when you get back. If you are getting regular sleep and taking time to recharge, you will be better prepared to make good decisions, be more patient with your children and more able to deal with the stress in your life.
- 5.Keep a journal. Some parents find a journal to be a helpful tool for keeping track of their children's progress, including what is working and what isn't, as well as their own feelings and day-to-day experiences.
Read more about supporting your children after an autism diagnosis in the Autism Speaks 100 Day Kit for Newly Diagnosed Families of Young Children1 or School Age Children.2
SUPPORTING YOUR OTHER CHILDREN
For parents of autistic children, so much focus and attention is placed on the autistic children that there is often less time and energy if you have other children that do not have autism. Brothers and sisters of children with autism frequently face their own challenges. Much more may be expected from these siblings. They often need help understanding the emotional reactions they are experiencing as a result of the many changes occurring in their lives. This support is essential to their future well-being.
- Help your other children understand autism and what is going on with their siblings. Talk with them early, often and in age-appropriate ways. Many books and other resources are available to help them to understand this diagnosis, including Autism Speaks' Siblings Guide to Autism.
- Help your children learn how to play and form relationships with their siblings with autism. There are a few simple things that you can do that will help with this, including teaching your other children how to get their siblings' attention and give simple instructions. It's also important to praise all your children when they play well together.
- Find a sibling support group. Support groups can help children build friendships and relate to other peers who have siblings with autism. Don't hesitate to consult a professional if you feel your children are internalizing most of their feelings or beginning to act out. The earlier you address this, the better.