not alone on this concept. Commitment to Country and Service takes a level of drive and sacrifice few will ever understand or care to attempt. For those in it, it becomes an expectation and the norm.
Late into my career, as things just outside of my sphere of control began to spiral downward, and I realized that those already-damaged relationships had become far too fractured, I knew my focus was lost. I had reached a low point in my career, in my life, and it was somewhere in this moment that those same words I uttered on that mountain side so long ago came to light. I took an audible pause and began to inventory the priorities, needs, relationships, and activities in my life. In this moment came the realization that I simply had way too many "things" in my life. I was "unbalanced."
I needed to make a significant change to the way I prioritized everything. I needed to regain balance. To begin the corrective procedures, I utilized a simple concept: I created an imaginary foundation. This imaginary foundation (like any four-cornered structure) is made up of four cornerstones, the steadfast and solid anchor points which the entire structure depends on for stability. Through some internal meditation, categorizing, and deep thought, I assigned four major priorities in my life to serve as those four cornerstones. My specific cornerstones are:
My specific cornerstones are:
- Faith: Service and time spent with my God.
- Family: Service and time invested in my Wife, my Children, my Marines, and my close personal friends.
- Health and well-being: My time and actions devoted to "my temple" (my body and my mind).
- Performance: Time invested in my work and daily requirements.
These cornerstones arguably could be different for any one Individual, depending on their own personal circumstances, feelings, and goals. The importance lies within one's ability to identify and assign their "True Priorities." Removing what appears to be "important" and defining, in your own life, what truly matters (this may take some time) and is the precise recipe for the entire concept to take shape.
A HEALTHY MANTRA: "When I am balanced, I am ultimately able to remove distractions that quite honestly do not matter. I am genuinely happier, healthier, more confident and assertive overall, and feel more productive."
With my cornerstones defined and fixed in place, I was then able to determine and implement the practical application of specific tasks and actions to be conducted daily to maintain balance within each cornerstone. In layman’s terms, I created a plan that involves cultivating a balance (time and action spent daily) that is both deliberate and intentional. I ensure the time invested in each action will positively impact the cornerstone. The key to this is balance and being intentional. When engaged in any one of my cornerstones, I ensure to mitigate any distractions and maintain direct and genuine presence in the moment. If a distraction arises, I must determine if the distraction is more important than the current time and result of my actions focused on the cornerstone. If the distraction is not as important, I remove it and return to the present moment. This has been the most significant part of the process. We as humans often tend to react to every change and distraction. Instead, focus on the task at hand, must be paramount. In this case, intentional and deliberate focus is spent on the truly important priority.
An example of my newfound daily plan with a balanced focus towards my priorities could look like the following: Health and Well-Being. A solid gym session in the morning followed by recovery. (Cell phone off, or on airplane mode to avoid unnecessary distractions)
Faith. Meditation and prayer first thing in the morning, before anyone else is awake, and again before bed (at both times my phone is set to silent and out of my reach). Performance. My undivided attention in my tasks and responsibilities during working hours, with two scheduled breaks for breath work.
Family. Scheduled time during the day to call or text my family to see how their day is going and to let them know they are important and appreciated. This followed by an evening unplugged from social media, television, and any other distractions that may take time away from my family and/or pull my focus away from the moment.
This is a daily, weekly, and monthly practice. By spending time each day focused on an equal level of investment to each cornerstone, I find that I am overall more productive and fulfilled. This may sound simple, but as "the fog of war" would